Happy Monday, everyone! But more importantly, HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!
“What I really fell in love with was the ability to craft a world born of grotesque truth, beautiful exaggeration, and a maniacal dedication to erasing the line between the two. Thompson wrote social commentary like Stephen King writes a haunted house story. But when dealing with the wasteland of American culture, the reader can never run out of the haunted house.”
Also, in case you missed it (as it ran late on Friday), my article on The Broke-Ass Bride, Spirit Airlines, and human kindness is running over at the Junior Varsity. Have heard a lot of encouraging things in response, and it’s inspired a number of people to action on Dana’s behalf. I encourage you to read it and share it with others, in hopes of fostering change. Just follow the link here to get started.
Was one hell of a Halloween weekend and we’ll keep it alive far into tonight. As you can see, I opted for Ash from Evil Dead and Army of Darkness. One of the few men alive who can hope to pull off the Bruce Campbell chin and I think I did him justice. Also discovered that you can buy a blood spattered chainsaw that makes noise and actually works from Toys R Us, but they don’t sell guns. Because that would be too violent. Unlike the heads hanging from spikes with blood and brain matter seeping out.
So that’s why I don’t have a Boomstick. But I did carry a fake chainsaw through a museum to catch the Tim Burton exhibit at LACMA at midnight, which I’m sure I’ll be covering for a post later this week. That was after enjoying some amazing dinner, featuring The Thing themed cuisine. Gloriously awful stuff. Delicious as it was frightening.
Have a great REAL Halloween everybody! Shop Smart; Shop S-Mart.
“Douglas Adams thought there was a restaurant at the end of the Universe. Louis Black thought it was a Starbucks across the street from another Starbucks. They were wrong. On an Amazon Wishlist, I’ve seen a scanning electron microscope listed between two anal plugs. I’ll pause here while your brain reboots.”
I’ve offered up comments on the Danny Elfman score for LA’s new Cirque du Soleil “IRIS”, which travels through the history of film in under two hours and under an entire chorus of semi-naked flying men. No complaints. Check out my contribution as part of the article here.
There was an announcement this week for a movie called “Safe House” which shares some elements with a film I re-wrote for a studio a few years back. This one has Ryan Reynolds and Denzel. I really hope it isn’t our script. Not because I don’t want to have written a Reynolds/Washington vehicle, nor because I’d then have to sue or something, but because the one we churned out was really bad. And the idea of Ryan Reynolds doing a bad movie seems unfathomable. So we’re all safe.
It’s that time of week again for featuring only the very best of Brock Wilbur in 140 character chunks. Apparently I was super into talking about the Grand Theft Auto games this week. But c’mon. That trailer for V! Coming back to LA! Nerding out…
28 Days Earlier / Freddy vs Jason vs The Board of Education / Invasion of the Bodice Snatchers / Event Planning Horizon / Final Guesstimation / Children of the Cornrows / The Wicker Chair / American Psychotherapist / Bubblebath Royale / Ichi The Podiatrist / The House on Inflated Property Value Hill / 30 Days of Brian McKnight / The Shiny / Halò, or the 120 Days of Awesome / Firestopper / Van Helsinki / The Last Mouse On The Left / I Know Who Drunk Dialed Me / Vivid Videodrome / I Spit On Your Gravy / Sweeney Todd: The Default-Swap Buyer of Wall Street / Cabin Fervor
Learned this weekend that Toys R Us will sell you a blood spattered chainsaw that moves and makes noise, but not a gun. That’s too violent. /// Fire breaks out at The Magic Castle. “Yeah, but where did the lighter fluid come from?” /// All this Kim Kardashian “divorce” stuff is just to distract from the real tragedy: her Poison Ivy Halloween Costume /// REASONS YOURE SINGLE: Your inability to properly use an apostrophe. /// “He knew the book would never be completed, as faux group motivation never helped him achieve a goal once in his life.”
#NaNoWriMoOpeners /// #NaNoWriMoOpeners “It was the worst of times. What? You want something more flowery? It’s kinda crap out there. Go take a look. I’ll wait.”
Set In Detroit, you will have to restart the failed American auto industry in order to have any A’s to GT. / Set in Los Angeles 1947, you drive around and write in your SUPER PRIVATE JOURNAL. Also, pedestrians will NOT jump away. / Somehow began life as a licensed adaptation of “Storage Wars”. Rockstar intends to removes the “storage” aspect in Beta. / It is actually GTA6. None of us deserved the real GTA5. / 100% Completion requires finishing separate side-quests on the iPad, the PSP, and checking-in at Subway. / Is not a game at all. Rather, an inspirational lifestyle book written by the Brothers Houser titled “Good Thoughts Are Valuable.” / Grand Theft Auto is the ONLY crime you can commit. Think about that. / Thanks to Kinect integration, the game can now take joy in listening to your desperate pleas for checkpoints mid-mission. / It takes place in Arkham. But guess what? Now that’s a city! And you’re Batman. Whoa, you don’t have to give me your money NOW. / “You don’t like movement in our engine? Fine. BOOM; Portal gun. There. Now shut it.” / “Look, if the Syndicate remake isn’t going to do Syndicate right, we are. Go Go Gadget Persuadertrons!” / “You want emotional depth? Super. Now when you gun down a prostitute, we’ll give you the option to rescue them. OR HARVEST.” / “Everyone seems to love 4 player co-op, so now players will individually control the character, car, gun, and weather.” / “You won’t see the true ending unless you assassinate all of the Templars and collect some feathers. Stop asking why.” / “Four words: Niko Bellic Tanooki Suit! We shoulda gone for five words for game five, but we never gave him a middle name.” / The main character is Pax Mayne, and when he gets super angry everyone goes real slow to see what he’ll do next. / Instead of repairing a bridge to get to other islands, you have to build the bridge from basic materials.
#MinecrafTAVFacts / “Written by the late Hunter S. Thompson, a stunning 86% of the game occurs in Bat Country. You play Richard Nixon.” / “We’ve applied McKee’s views on act structure and genre to every individual mission. Ironically, we’ve also added voice over.”
Thanks to you, dear readers, my “Spirit of Human Kindness” piece will have a different ending very, very soon. /// Thanks
@Amazon for the heads-up about My Fair Lady on Blu-Ray. I’m not sure what I bought wrong to get information so very right. /// Lohan goes to Jail, Blur gets back together, GTAV trailer out, and I’m seeing Dethklok do a tribute to Queen. Nope. Today is Christmas. /// Mady just tried to get me with Knock Knock/Who’s There/Interrupting Cow via G-Chat. I’m in awe of so many elements of that humor equation. Cruelly, I typed “interrupting cow, who?” and didn’t hit send for several minutes, while she waited, poised. #ExcellentAtMyJob /// A shocking number of times per day I have to say, “Now here’s what you do if you get caught.” #ExcellentAtMyJob /// The upcoming film about Jackie Robinson’s life is called “42”. Okay, Douglas Adams. You were right about one person. /// Thanks to the Underworld film series, the word “Super-Lycan” just entered the lexicon. Sometimes we should applaud ourselves, Hollywood. /// Today I received Orson Welles radioplay collection and Halo Wars. Imagine crossover Welles narration: “Killing spree, I dare say old chum.” /// Woke up this morning to discover that TURKEY BOWL is STILL streaming on Netflix! Wow! If I hadn’t seen it a billion times… ok once more… /// Dear Foster The People: What the balls is happening in your lyrics? Signed, The People. /// I always just assumed that Paranormal Activity was an adaptation of “House of Leaves”. It is possible I am incorrect.
I once shot a bunch of pigeons and the achievement didn’t pop. / The only property I’ve ever owned. / The deeply instilled fear that I will get arrested rather than die, because when you die you keep your guns. / In San Andreas, spent a day weight lifting to improve my player stats, while real me ate nachos on an old couch. / IV: Drunk in game while drunk IRL. Turns out I’m a much better driver impaired, but an equally bad drunk dialer. / Finally had a reason to learn the rules of darts. / Look, if you put
@rickygervais on the TV, why bother leaving my apartment to kill hotdog vendors? / I never went bowling, until my black friend gave me his cell number. NOW THAT’S ALL WE DO. / Is that a jetpack? That’s a jetpack. K. / I liked my car. Until I saw that car. Now that is my car. I like it. Wait. Is that an ambulance? / I ate a cheeseburger and it has physically altered my dimensions. Did it have 30,000 calories? No cheese next time. / One thing I learned in prison was forgetting how to swim. / My character has multiple houses and 200+ outfits. I rent an apartment and own a Nightmare Before Xmas hoodie. / Today, I sent 20 emails to in-game family members. I haven’t called my mom in a month. She never gives me missions.
Ha! Just saw myself at the protest in “Conan O’Brien Can’t Stop.” This will be a good documentary. /// Me and Siri just had a difficult (and sudden) conversation about rape. That’s the last time I ask her for help on car insurance rates. /// Tonight my home state of Kansas felt an Earthquake. That’s as improbable as Los Angeles feeling the love of Jesus Christ. /// Roll my eyes at guy buying lotto ticket at gas station, while I’m filling up to drive hundreds of miles to Vegas to lose much more.
Having written only one film about video games, I fear my “Nerd Cred” is not fully validated. My friend, director Michael La Breche, had the same overwhelming concern. So he’s invited me to come aboard as producer for his documentary on the world of indie comic artists, titled “The Independents.”
There’s a great team behind this, several months of footage already shot (including Comikaze Expo), and a big year planned in 2012; including shooting on location in iconic locals such as Paris and Kansas. Like, my two favorite places. Ever.
Check out the film’s website RIGHT HERE, follow them on the Twitters, check out this interview with Megan Levens of “Somewhere In Between,” and watch this space for the announcement for our big Meltdown Comics show, hosted by yours truly, and almost assuredly featuring a headlining set by star of Lost Moon Radio and silver screen, Lauren Flans.
The Executive Summary and Business Prospectus goes out today for the feature film I’m making with director Nick Slatkin (Placebo) and co-producers Dana LaRue (Your Friends Close) & Jonathan Frager (Dead Inside). We’re shooting in January, so if you or anyone you know wants to invest in the greatest movie of all time, now’s the time to let me know. I’m so serious. You want to be a billionaire, right? This won’t make that happen. Millionaire? Super likely. Interested? Doesn’t hurt to ask.
#ChildrensBooksMadeMoreExciting: Are You There, God? It’sa Me, Mario! /// The Very Hungry Human Caterpillar /// The Babysitters, Clubbed /// Where The Sidewalk (And By Extension, This Failed Experiment Called Humanity) Ends /// James Franco & The Giant Peach /// One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Mercury Poisoning /// Mr. Brown Can Moo, Why Can’t You Live Up To Your Father’s Expectations It’s Killing Him You Know /// If You Give A Mouse A Bump /// Miss Nelson Is Missing A Finger /// Love You Forev… Well, Let’s Not Get Ahead Of Ourselves Here /// Alexander, Who Used To Be 1% Last Sunday /// The Stinky Cheese Man & Other Fairly Invasive Medical Texts /// The Runaway Bunny & Clyde /// The Little Engine That Could See You While You Sleep /// The Velveteen Rabbi /// The Bipolar Express /// Are You My Martyr? /// Brown Bear, Brown Bear, What Degree Of Racial Profiling Do You See? /// Pat Robertson The Bunny /// If You Give Cthulhu A Muffin
I saw a Dave Matthews impersonator in Vegas between Bart Simpson and Optimus Prime. 3:1 odds he dies tragically. /// I thought we should change Book-It! to
#OccupyBooks, but then I thought of all the children the police would have to shoot. /// @CourtneyStodden Twas terrible tragedy that thelonious thesaurus twere tribbled towards Twitter tempermententing trivial t’idiotic thoughts. /// Good thing there’s not a Call Of Duty lock-out this season. Get your shit together, NBA. It’s jumpshots, not headshots. /// THREE DIFFERENT CASTING NOTICES to play “Frankenstein” today. I may be 6’7″ and fueled by nightmares but Romantic Lead, anyone?!?! /// Will the Junior Varsity buy me a copy of the Atlas Shrugged film to review? Wait, what am I saying? Ayn Rand would LOVE torrents! /// Those playing MW3: Are there still missions where you suddenly die tragically but only after dying hundreds of times to reach trigger point? /// If it weren’t for knowing the awful truth, I’d think Jim Cramer was the most satirical character Arrested Development ever created. /// Jared Leto is the reason freebies lists were invented. Everyone wants him, but you have a greater chance of running into a chupacabra. /// I enjoy handing out “K” to strangers on Klout. It feels like I’m in Party Monster, and Twitter is my Disco Bloodbath 2000.
Tuesday (Dec 6th) at 7pm, I’ll be opening the first ever stand-up comedy night at Best Fish Taco. You heard that right. Welcome to the Big Time, Brock Wilbur. This promises to be a regular show with two hours of material, put together by Jeremy Burke of Fishy Fishy fame, with the likes of Wesley Hudson, Hampton Yount, Max Fine, and Dave Sirus.
This Thursday (Dec 8th) at Meltdown Comics we’re having a blow-out fundraiser for The Independents, our documentary on the world of indie comic book artists. Doors at 7, 8pm start time for a show featuring the band The Gods of Macho, who wear matching outfits so you know they’re incredible.
There’s a silent auction, screening of new footage from the documentary, and stand-up comedy hosted by Nicholas Clark and Evan Gaustad. Featuring: Sax Carr, Josh Simpson, Tom Franck, Ed Greer, Colin Hughes, Lisa Curry, Pat Bishop, Alie & Georgia, Zoe Chavet, Aaron Gershman, Heather Wood, and yours truly! Also, booze. Lots of booze. Can’t overstate that enough.
Come out to support an excellent independent film and have an unforgettable night in a room action packed with Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles memorabilia. For realsies. And thanks to Aaron Spacemuseum for the poster design!
Then, Friday night (Dec 9th) at Cafe-Club Fais Do-Do, the once in a forever pairing of the tremendous Lost Moon Radio show and The SixtyNineties. I would say this is the best show you’ll ever see, but considering the Meltdown show the night before, I’ll say this event will tie for the best show you’ll ever see.
Last night, during rehearsal, we spontaneously added the greatest song ever to our set-list. Hint: It is only one note from start to finish. And a huge special thanks to Joe Filipas of Sugo Media for helping make that killer poster.
8:30 PM SHARP. Tickets are cheaper (and special VIP packages available) through the online store at the Lost Moon Store. While you’re there, check out the pre-release of their holiday album: It Had To Be Yule.